“Macramé Constructions of Casuistry”

From Sadly, No!:

The kind of polemical reasoning that…occurs throughout the WingNet, wherever its cultees confront current events — seemed for a long time to be a way of ordering the world through a kind of ritual storytelling. We saw it like this: The writer begins by eyeing some emerging news or gossip item and decides what meaning it ought to have, in the manner of a sculptor inspecting a block of marble for the forms possible within it. He then applies the chisel, removing context and uncongenial detail and adding decorative work where needed, until the item emerges as a sort of tiny reverse roman à clef, full of recognizable things in fictional arrangements.

The moral at the heart of each story is nearly always a variation of the Wingnut Credo: “In our virtue, the unworthy provoke us. Reckoning will come.” And we thought that the point of constructing the stories was to arrive at the moral each time, from one way and then another, until the ruts from one’s cart wheels and sleigh runners were so deeply inscribed that all possible stories seemed to fall into them and travel toward the same conclusion.

That’s what we thought. But that was before Obama won, and having won was inaugurated, at which point the online right seemed to realize that something had taken place that couldn’t be rationalized away, that Obama was no longer just a man-on-TV for them to hiss at, but a figure invested with real power over the direction of the country, and with nothing to stop him from going against the Republican consensus, against the laws of conservatism itself, literally at will…

What Ed and its other practitioners seem to be doing is taking the stories that life and the vasty Internet hands them…and creating these macramé constructions of casuistry not just as stories, and not as arguments that their interpretations of events are correct — not as a means of proving anything to anybody — but as arguments of the Talmudic sort that are addressed to men, but are cast at such an arc always to land finally upon God’s desk, pleading a case before His bench as to what is and isn’t fair, and what therefore ought to be true.

Beautiful, huh?

A Confession…

I like bullying robotic telephone menus.

I shout at them until they give me an operator.

It gives me a laugh every time.

t.e.a.b.a.g.z.

Andrew Sullivan:

“If you favor no bailouts, then say so. If you want to see the banking system collapse, then say so. If you think the recession demands no fiscal stimulus, then say so. If you favor big cuts in Medicare, Medicaid, social security and defense, then say so. I keep waiting for Reynolds to tell us what these protests are for; and he can only spin what they they are against.

“All protests against spending that do not tell us how to reduce it are fatuous pieces of theater, not constructive acts of politics. And until the right is able to make a constructive and specific argument about how they intend to reduce spending and debt and borrowing, they deserve to be dismissed as performance artists in a desperate search for coherence in an age that has left them bewilderingly behind.”

Just what we need…more rain.

Spring’s been a bit vicious here the past few years. In ’07, we had a serious drought that let to some awful wildfires in southern Georgia, and then a tornado in Tallahassee. Last year was relatively calm, but the pollen was outrageous–a thick yellow cloud that settled like lunar dust over every surface, turning my white car a sickly mustard color.

This year, it’s rain. Lots and lots of rain.

Here’s I-10 headed over the Suwanee River in Florida last weekend. Normally this bridge passes over the river fairly high up, leading to a nice view of the valley and riverside landings. My dad said the water was only about 10 feet under the bridge, that it looked “spooky”.

The Ochlockonee River to the north and west of Tallahassee has also been swollen out of its riverbed. I passed over it last week and was shocked, even after seeing the news reports of people flooded out of their homes. I wanted to get a photo, but there was nowhere safe to park.

This weather needs to chill out and become summer already. There’s supposed to be at least one or two months of peace before hurricane season begins…

Ooh, Malibu!

Part of my ongoing project to reconstruct as much of my demented youth as possible, includes collecting things I used to own. Well, in my idle search for some back issues of ‘Teen Magazine, I ran across this little piece of early-’90s nostalgia:

Yes, that’s right—Malibu Musk. It, and Love’s Baby Soft, were advertised in literally every issue. And while I never liked Love’s that much, those cheapo cans of Malibu cluttered up my desktop for several years.

It sold at the drugstore, meaning that I could afford it without having to ask my parents. It smelled a little edgy, a little party-girl, without being cheap-smelling or heavy.

I’ll probably get a bottle off Amazon, just for shits ‘n’ giggles. Wonder if I’ll still like it? One assumes that twenty years would improve my taste…but it’s astonishing how many of my childhood decisions I can still get behind.

And how awesome is the Crazy Christian Lady at the end of the video? Happy Easter!

2009 Desktop #3

G20: Aftermath

So, we have little stories of Obama’s subtle activities, the words he apparently whispered in the ears of Angela Merkel and Hu Jintao. It’s hard to tell, just from hearsay, whether his influence was that powerful, or whether the other G20 leaders are just being diplomatic about a popular President.

One thing can be witnessed, however: the tone of the activities.

Did this gathering of leaders not feel and seem different than in the past? I’m certainly not just giving Obama credit for that…the country he leads directly caused the biggest financial crisis in recent memory. But that’s exactly it. You’d expect outright hostility towards the U.S. leader. Can you imagine the reception Bush would have received in the past few days?

But no, the Obamas apparently charmed everyone…and everyone appeared willing to be charmed. And things were accomplished—by both the charm, and the willingness.

So what we had was a gathering of leaders, who actually got something done, and crowds of protesters, who were not near as violent as predicted. In fact, many were peaceful and whimsical, and that was actually reported on, too—not just the brick-throwers.

In a strange way, this is the first G-whatever meeting I can recall where the leaders were as important as the protesters. Usually one gets a mental image of a shady, smoke-filled room concealing soul-selling deals…while herds of desperate people shout outside.

There’s a radical level of willingness-to-be-watched at this summit. It’s everyone’s property and everyone’s business, this time. Leaders joke on camera and the smiles reach their eyes; protesters video themselves playing giant Monopoly, and Twitter when the police bust up their road blockage. Who wins?

Everyone or no one, depending on who you ask. I’m going for everyone.

President Obama gave a press conference at the very end of the summit. I’ll admit to a little smugness at the reception he received. Whatever you might hear desperately babbled about how the man can’t speak without a Teleprompter, it’s bullshit. Of course he can. In the near-hour in which he took questions, more information came out of his mind and his mouth than most politicians verbalize in a year. So what if there’s pauses and “ums”? That’s just about the dumbest garbage complaint about a Democrat I’ve ever heard.

And at the end? They applauded him.

When’s the last time an American president was applauded by international reporters after a press conference?

None had shoes in their hands, either.